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Eclipse.

So... I'm going to post my rant on Eclipse. Hopefully it doesn't anger too many people, but I'm quite an opinionated person, and Eclipse definitely brought out those opinions full force. This rant is pretty anti-Bella and VERY anti-Jacob. Just a warning to those who feel like those two characters are saints or something. 

Eclipse. With such a strong word, you’d think a strong book would come out of it. Uh, no. I was completely wrong.

 

Let me start off by saying that I have grown to actually hate this series. Twilight is by far the best out of the three. The first of the series always seems to be the best. New Moon just flat out sucked – I don’t hate a book more than I hate New Moon. It had to be the lack of the Cullens that drove me away from it. I barely had enough strength to finish it.

 

I never, ever had high hopes for Eclipse after reading the tragedy that was New Moon. I knew it’d have a lot more Jacob and his whiny, childish ways, and Bella being something she definitely wasn’t in Twilight. What was Stephenie thinking when she added Jacob effing Black to the mix of everything? UGH!

 

I’m not going to slam Stephenie; but I am going to be probably the only one to slam Eclipse in its entirety. There were only, like, two things I enjoyed, and those were hardly good now that I think about it. So this is kind of one HUGE rant about how much I really, really, REALLY didn’t like Eclipse. But I will put in my few good points at the bottom.

 

*Note: There is some language in here not suited for children. Or people who don’t like profanity. Sorry, but when I get passionate about something, I have a tendency to cuss.

 

 

  1. Let’s start off with my main problem: Bella. Oh how Bella has changed over these three books. In Twilight she was happy, but klutzy and so naïve. In New Moon, she was so emo and depressed that it made me want to cut my wrists and black my eyes (haha. Hawthorne Heights. How emo). In Eclipse, she was a mixture of both. Now, I’ve always not liked Bella. She seemed unreal, like the Cullens should have seemed. The CULLENS were more realistic than Bella! Bella is pretty much the definition of a Mary-Sue. She has all of this drama, but always seems to overcome it. She has the most gorgeous guy in school, but she herself is plain and ugly. She’s the damsel in distress at all times, and it’s fucking annoying. And, if you think about it, she’s just a recreation of Stephenie. Their descriptions match up perfectly. But that’s not the point at all. The point is that she is a selfish, self-absorbed, undeserving character. She doesn’t deserve all of the attention she gets from any of the other characters. We’re constantly reminded how boring and plain she is, right? She doesn’t deserve an ounce of the love Edward has for her. She doesn’t deserve him. Her actions in Eclipse were totally uncalled for, and her kissing Jacob back was the lowest blow that whore could throw. How DARE she kiss another guy; CHEAT on EDWARD (yes, that is quite a strange sentence) right after he proposes?! Oh, how I marked those pages with words my parents would never want to see. Who in their right mind could love anyone else when they have EDWARD? That still doesn’t seem possible to me. And then there’s this whole “I’m scared to get married”. What. The. Fuck. If a guy I loved more than anything in the entire world proposed to me, I would not be moaning and groaning about how young we were or hesitating about saying yes. God damn, I can’t stand Bella for her totally selfish ways. She wants it her way, or no way at all. She wants both Edward and Jacob, and when she has to choose, she gets all pouty because she can’t have them both. SELFISH. And all of this constant complaining about Jacob and how she’s mad at him one second then not the next is fucking annoying also. Grow a damn backbone and stay mad at him for a while. Geez! Not everyone in the world is like that; some of us are stronger, and we find Bella’s klutzy, dependent, stupid ways very frustrating. Her character change over the books really irks me. I may be the only person to say this, but I really didn’t want Victoria to die right away. No, I wanted her or Riley to rip Bella to shreds then get killed. Sure, Edward would’ve been eaten up, but we wouldn’t have to put up with anymore Bella-loving-Jacob nonsense. 

 

  1. The second problem: Jacob. I’ve never liked him. Ever. I hated him the second he was mentioned in Twilight, because I had this horrible feeling that he was going to complicate things for Bella and Edward in the long run. And look what happened; he did. If it’s even possible, I hate Jacob so much more in Eclipse than I did in New Moon. He also was selfish, childish, and undeserving. His selfishness made Bella realize how she’s in love with him. Good, because she should run away with him and leave Edward for someone who knows how to stay FAITHFUL. He honestly thought he could pull Bella away from Edward? HAH! Edward has too much of an appeal. Jacob isn’t nearly as amazing as Edward. He’s a stupid puppy who knows NOTHING. His childish wooing of Bella was NOT funny. Some might find it cute, but I think it’s really really annoying. Not only did he push himself onto her, he even went as far as self-sacrifice to get what he wanted. Idiotic boy. Bella – whorish Bella – is not worth that. He needs to go imprint on someone else, because OBVIOUSLY Bella is not his soul mate.  Jacob doesn’t deserve all of the praise Charlie or Bella give him. He’s a child still, and doesn’t understand what true love really is. He thinks he might love Bella more than Edward, but Edward’s love is so real and unconditional that even us readers can feel what he feels for Bella (although I don’t understand why he’d love that stupid slut after what she did…). Jacob is the most annoying character to ever be invented, and I’m pretty sure Stephenie only included him in the books because she has grown so attached to him that she wanted him around just so she could write about his “well toned, muscled chest”. Gag me, already! I’d rather read about Edward ripping Victoria’s head with VIVID details than read one more thing about how Jacob is supposedly “good-looking”. Puh-Lease. Stephenie is in love with Jacob Black; more than Edward, I think. That’s why she wanted to write the epilogue in his POV. I refuse to read another book by her if he is one of the main characters. I am not going to torture myself by reading about him ever again. And if she thought that by writing the epilogue in Jacob’s POV that I would have any sort of sympathy or remorse for hating him, she was dead wrong. I still hated him; if not more for having to read from his POV. Everyone argues, “He helped Bella in New Moon!” In what way? If anything, he’s like another type of drug for Bella. Edward may be her drug, but without Jacob (in New Moon and Eclipe), she was cranky and bitchy. Obviously he is NOT good for her. No matter what other people say, I will NEVER like him. Stephenie has to come to terms with the fact that some people despise Jacob Black with all of their hearts, and it’s never going to change. Ever.

 

  1. I didn’t have a problem with Edward until later in the book. How can he forgive her! How could he ever forgive Bella for loving Jacob nearly as much as she loves him?! I don’t really care if he was there for her throughout New Moon, or if he can give her things Edward can’t. Edward lost his backbone in this book. Seriously, what happened to the Edward from Twilight. What happened to the strong, confident, stunning Edward that I was obsessed with? Oh, Bella and her damn feelings for fucking Jacob happened. He shouldn’t have forgiven her for kissing Jacob back. No. A normal teenage boy would’ve gone ballistic. I realize he’s not normal, but damn! At least yell at her! Call her a slut! A whore! A skank! SOMETHING! She deserves to be berated by him; to be completely put down. He might reason that if she’s happy, he’ll let her go; but is he honestly that unselfish? I don’t think so. In my opinion, she deserves nothing from him at all. I wish he had the fucking guts to just walk away and break her heart time after time after time. He may be old-fashioned, but damn! Berate the bitch. Lord knows I was throughout the whole book. But other than that, I love this guy more than ever because, even if he’s like a jellyfish now. And I thought it was SO cute and great that he was so protective over her. Think about it if it were Jacob who was with her instead of Edward. He wouldn’t want Bella running off to go and see Edward just like Edward didn’t want her to go run off with those fucking mutts. His actions are completely justifiable, unlike Bella’s and Jacob’s. I think another girl should’ve come into the picture so Bella would have some competition. I think Edward should fall in love with another girl so Bella will know exactly how Edward felt when he realized that Bella was in love with Jacob. Pity that Stephenie doesn’t realize how PLOTLESS it is without competition for Bella. Ugh.

 

  1. Pretty much the rest of the book annoyed me. That whole Edward/Bella/Jacob love triangle really pissed me off. I mean, really really really REALLY pissed me off. Jacob finally learned to back off, but OF COURSE he’s still in the books because Stephenie is way too much in love with him to let the damn character go. I was seriously almost crying out of happiness when I read that it was Jacob that got hurt. But of course Bella faints when he gets hurt, because she cares SO much about him. That’s some serious bad fan fiction plot for you right there. Damn, I really wanted him to die. Badly. And the itty bitty mention of the Volturi? Pssh. That was hardly enough to justify how important they truly are. They should’ve killed Bella right there on the spot for not being a vampire yet. And the battle was really a big disappointment. A VERY big disappointment. It was built up to be this HUGE war type thing, and then we don’t even get descriptions of it! We get Bella’s breathing and what that damn werewolf was thinking. STUPID! I wanted blood; I wanted ACTION. Even the fight with Victoria was so anti-climatic that I mostly skimmed over it. The only good part was when Edward ripped her head off (even though I was totally rooting for Victoria to rip Bella to shreds at this point). And for him to apologize for her seeing that? She’s the one who wants to be a vampire, and she can’t even deal with the smell of blood! She NEEDED to see that to see how she’s going to have to live one day. Damn. And Charlie… God, he was a nuisance. I hate his prejudices toward Edward. If only he could see that Edward is ten million times the man Jacob will ever be. What really got me, though, was how we didn’t get to see Charlie reaction, Renee’s reaction, or the wedding at all. And the UST between Edward and Bella… UGH! She teases us with this big sex thing, but of course she can’t do anything about it because this series (although dealing with some vampires) is primarily written for teenagers and she obviously doesn’t think that we need to know about that (when we’re all really cheering for it to happen). And the epilogue… Well, let’s just say that if Breaking Dawn is in Jacob’s POV, I will not read it. I’ll read spoilers.

 

I could really go on all day about how horrible I thought the book was. It was so anti-climatic, and pretty much like a badly written fan fiction. I didn’t have high hopes for it, what with how New Moon turned out, but I gave it the benefit of the doubt. I wasted nineteen ninety-four on a book I hated. Again. It was not worth my money. I should’ve saved it and bought the new Atreyu and Aiden CD’s coming out. But, despite all of that ranting I just did, there were three good parts. Not great, because I expected them to be so much better, but I believe that Stephenie has lost her vampire love and is just writing to keep Jacob alive.  *shrugs*

 

 

    1. I fell in love with Jasper all over again. From the first time he was described in Twilight, I was madly in love with him. I usually don’t like blondes (in real life, movies, or books), but there was something about him that made me love him. And I found that out in New Moon. Oh, how I wished for him to chomp Bella into pieces. He’s so moody, just how I like ‘em. After hearing his story was going to be in Eclipse, I was so happy. I totally loved him in Eclipse; how emo but how determined he was to explain. Of course, Bella didn’t deserve his attention, because she’s not worthy of even looking at Jasper (or the rest of the Cullens, but whatever). Despite loving his story – and him even more – I felt that it could’ve been more emotional and more of a story, and not something that seemed like it was being read out of a book. I think Stephenie rushed through it so she could get back to Jacob. Whatever. Jasper’s story held so much history for vampires, and the ending was so adorable that I DEMAND a book on Jasper and Alice alone. Only them. Maybe their travels to get to the Cullens? Jasper is definitely my favorite character, because he is just so damn emo, and I think that deep down he’s still thirsty for human blood. And his whole teaching thing: HAWT! <33 Every time his name was mentioned I smiled. And at the end with the newborn vampire… Yeah, soooo adorable. I had a feeling that he felt something for her; grief, and sympathy, maybe. He’s perfect. =)

 

    1. I’ve always liked Rosalie, but now more than ever. I loved her story. Sure, it was VERY cliché, but she’s such a strong character that I’d love to see more of. Too bad Jacob and his damn wolf friends took over these books. She could have been a great character one day. And I absolutely LOVE how she still hates Bella. Oh, it’s great. Finally someone inside of the books that hates her! Rosalie’s story made me love her even more, because even if it was totally out of a bad fan fiction (like the rest of the damn book), she was still so stubborn and ready to try to change Bella’s mind. Good. Rosalie’s right to be jealous, a little. She has SO much more than Bella does, so what in the hell possessed Edward to fall for the plain, ugly human girl? Rosalie has got to be one of the best characters in Eclipse because of her dislike for Bella.

 

    1. And despite all of my complaining, I still love Edward. Sure, he had no backbone, and he let Bella do whatever the hell she wanted, but I’ll be damned if he’s not one of the best characters ever (Roiben from Tithe <3333, Constantine from Sunshine, and a few others are now above him, but still…). Edward was too sweet for words at some points, and I couldn’t help but smile when he’d do something. All throughout the book I was having little fangirl moments because he was SO amazing. The proposal was waaaay too cute, and that UST… OMG! That boy oozes sex. Bella’s stupid for stopping him. She doesn’t deserve him, the selfish skank. He sacrificed SO much for her, and she repays him by kissing that nasty werewolf. But the reason I love Edward so much is because he’s not flawless anymore. I always thought he was completely flawless, but if you look really close and actually read what he’s saying and concentrate on it, he’s got so many flaws. And that makes him the most realistic to me. The Cullens, in general, are more realistic than Bella, Jacob, and most of the other characters. They’ve got human flaws that the others seem to lack (maybe it’s just weak character development…? Hmmm, ponder that.) He’s so imperfect, but so beautiful, that it makes it hard to picture him anymore. But regardless, he’s one of my favorites. <33

 

 

 

So… There it is. My rant about Eclipse. I seriously did not like the book. Stephenie disappointed me (again). I wish she had stuck to the original, important plot: Making Bella into a vampire. We didn’t need all of these distractions (Jacob, Victoria, etc.). We all wanted her to be a vampire at one point, but now I just want her to go away. That may be harsh, but this whole thing has turned into something from fanfiction.net, and I have a horrible feeling that it’ll only get worse as the books keep on coming. I’m anxiously awaiting Midnight Sun, because I want a breather from the messed up head that is Bella. Plus, knowing what Edward’s thinking will be truly great.

 

I was disappointed. So so so disappointed. It was a lackluster, boring, anti-climatic book with no character development. I don’t think that I’ll be reading Breaking Dawn. Sorry, but after another tragedy of a book, I don’t think I could stomach hearing Bella whine about how much she loves both of them.





*Yeah, I'm not a very nice person. But I'm not one to beat around the bush. I'm pretty blunt when it comes to not liking something. So feel free to comment or whatever on it. I just feel like I needed to get that out of my system before I imploded. XD I'd love to hear others opinions on the subject as well, so feel free to state them. I'm not the kind of person to overreact and put you down for your opinions. I ask for that same respect, though. =)

Comments

( 15 comments — Leave a comment )
riffuel
Aug. 13th, 2007 11:34 pm (UTC)
emery <3

Okay, I agree way too much about Stephenie being too in love with Jacob. It's like she's forgotten how to write something good, and she's just sticking Jacob here and there for her own wantings. I thought we were through with Jacob in New moon, but the bitch had to come crawling back. >:

I really looked forward to Eclipse being "liek omg greatz" but reading through it, it was so damn predictable. I miss Twilight, when you didn't know what the hell was going to happen next. I miss Twilight Bella, and Twilight Jake (You know, when he only had three lines, and the bitch was gone). Only people I looked forward to hearing about was the Cullens. But the damn dogs had to take over 400+ pages damnit!

And if that epilogue was ment for us to pity Jacob, it sure as hell didn't work. Reading that epilogue I thought "hahaha, and stay a dog. bitch."

walkwithfire_x
Aug. 14th, 2007 06:07 pm (UTC)
Exactly! I kept wondering why he was still there, when the issue was clearly resolved at the end of New Moon when Edward came back. But NOOOOOO! We HAD to have more Jacob. As if he weren't shoved down our throats enough during New Moon, she attempted to choke us with him in Eclipse. Ugh.

haha. I know exactly what you mean. Twilight Jake wasn't nearly as annoying as New Moon or Eclipse Jake. And I thought the Cullens would be in Eclipse more, seeing as Bella's changing day was getting even closer. But again, the stupid mangy mutts had to come and ruin everything.

It definitely didn't work. I just wanted to hear about the wedding, but all we hear about is how annoying Leah is, and how much "pain" Jacob is in. Well now he knows how Edward felt, huh? Good. I hope he feels ten times the pain Edward felt when Bella gets turned into a vampire and he knows he can never be with her. NEVER. XD I was like, "yesss! Be gone with you, vile creature!" when I read that he was running away and didn't want to come back. haha.
riffuel
Aug. 15th, 2007 01:45 am (UTC)
Hahaha. And I hope Jacob realizes that Edward was the one who made the bigger sacrifice. Jacob doesn't see that he's not ment to be with Bella, because if he was then he would of imprinted on her. He needs to grow up already. Edward and Bella are ment to be together, like Bella's mother said about how one moves, the other moves as well.

OH and don't forget that Jacob gave Bella that stupid carved wolf for her to wear around her wrist, I hope that isn't a way for Stephenie to lure him back in Breaking Dawn.
walkwithfire_x
Aug. 15th, 2007 02:03 am (UTC)
Oh yes, he does need to realize that. Jacob thinks he's so unselfish, but he doesn't see that Edward is the most unselfish human being ever. I was so scared that Jacob was going to imprint on Bella after they were talking about it, but thank god that didn't happen! And Bella's mom is a genius for figuring that out. haha. It just proves how much they need to be together.

Oh that damn, ugly ass wolf thing. It wasn't even sweet. I was like, "uh... ew?" Now what Edward gave her was sooo amazing. I may sound superficial, but I'd prefer a diamond over a piece of driftwood any day. Plus, it's an heirloom, supposedly, and I think it's more important. But now that I think about it, it probably is a way for Stephenie to bring that bitch back in the next book. Great. Just great.
riffuel
Aug. 16th, 2007 04:51 am (UTC)
Yeah it's so obvious it Bella/Edward. If Stephenie lets her feelings get in the way and has Jacob end up with Bella, I will seriously throw those books away.

I would prefer the heirloom any day. Not to mention that rock she'll be wearing on her ring finger.
walkwithfire_x
Aug. 16th, 2007 05:40 am (UTC)
I've come close to giving up on them. During New Moon I cheated and skipped to the back to see if Edward came back, and after finding out that he did, I was so relieved. I'm with you on throwing them out, though.

haha. Yes, me too. I'd prefer those any day to the silly wolf charm that she insists on wearing. I think it's quite stupid that she refuses to accept gifts from Edward. Not to sound materialistic, but if someone gives me something, I take it without question or protest. I guess being a teenager has something to do with that, but I'd love for Edward to give me something.

Have you been reading the arguments that have been happening on Topaz & Debussy? I like to laugh at the Jaocb lovers who try to defend him. I mean, it's their opinion, but I just don't see how anything he did was justifiable...
riffuel
Aug. 16th, 2007 09:43 pm (UTC)
I read New Moon once, but reread the beginning and the end. I just think book one and two would be pointless if it ended with Jacob/Bella.

Same here. If I were Bella, I'd have Edward crush that silly wolf charm.

I've tried to stay open minded but with all the "but Edward did this, and he did that in new moon!!1!" but it's gotten to the point where the Jacob lovers know they're wrong but they insist on bringing up Edward's faults. Like if you look back a page in Topaz & Debussy someone says that Edward almost rapes Bella in the end. I laughed sooo hard. I'm going to have to link you to it.
walkwithfire_x
Aug. 16th, 2007 10:33 pm (UTC)
Exactly! It would mean that Twilight and New Moon would mean absolutely nothing if those two became a couple.

Oh, that arugment is SO funny! Yes, Edward almost rapes her when Bella has been trying to get him to have sex with her since the beginning of the book. Toooootally. But Jacob pushing himself onto Bella? No, that's not almost rape or sexual assault at all. He's just trying to make her "see the light". I've tried to understand their side, I really have, but what Jacob did disgusts me so much.
riffuel
Aug. 16th, 2007 11:13 pm (UTC)
yeah, I've tried to be unbiased. If anyone who hadn't read the series and read that page where Jacob forces himself on Bella, they would agree that it was assault.

The thing is, they say that Edward almost rapes her because she says "no. wait. stop" but if you read more before that, it shows that she's about to give herself to him but then decides to stick with her plan and tell Edward how it's all going to work out. When she said "no. wait. stop" she ment for him to quit because she needed to tell him something, not because she didn't want him at all. That's what they aren't understanding. Tell that to Jacob fans, then they say "but Edward was controlling in the beginning of the book!!11"
walkwithfire_x
Aug. 17th, 2007 06:58 pm (UTC)
Some people actually thought that him forcing himself onto her was "hot". Well, many of my friends thought it was disgusting, but a few would've loved to have been roughed around like that. Um, ew. Stupid masochists...

Yes! I've tried so many times to explain that, but they're all "Nooo!!!1111one He doesn't stop fater that!!" Um, yes, he does. And if the tables were turned, and it were Jacob who was her boyfriend, he wouldn't want her going around his arch enemy. I understand why he was being so controlling. He didn't want Bella to gt hurt. If they even stop to think about it in reverse, Jacob would've been exactly the same way.
riffuel
Aug. 17th, 2007 11:15 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I don't think I would like a first kiss to be painful. :/

It's so understandable why Edward did what he did in the beginning. He was after Bella's safety, and in the beginning he even said he wasn't going to lose her again. (which, I think bella doesn't deserve him anymore at all) I say we give Bella some competition in Breaking dawn, give her a taste of her own medicine.
kaiwynn
Aug. 14th, 2007 02:20 am (UTC)
You know, your humongous rant has almost diminished the enormous love I have for Eclipse. Almost. :D

But I can completely see where you're coming from.
walkwithfire_x
Aug. 14th, 2007 06:09 pm (UTC)
It was quite long, wasn't it? I get really passionate about things, and when I do my rants tend to get verrrrry long. I wrote a rant on Pirates of the Caribbean once, and it was a lot longer than this one... haha.
shadesofhappy
Jul. 10th, 2008 05:46 am (UTC)
i completely agree!
i loved twilight. i stayed up all night reading it and it took me only a few days to finish it.

it took me like three months to finish eclipse because i wasn't motivated to read that stupid, cheesy book. i'm selling it on ebay because i don't even want to look at it. i hate bella, i hate jacob, and i hate edward for being so damn loving and patient with bella when she found out she was in love with jacob black. ughh i hate bella so much.
( 15 comments — Leave a comment )

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